Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Life as Real

***
One more shothit
my mind goes blank
                                  no
not blank -
                  - there's just too many words is all.

For you:
        that's okay. I didn't need you anyway.
You loved me at my worst but can't keep up with my best
                     Oh how I wish that you could fly with me
                     but I know how you are devoted to your husband, Count Lorenzo
                     but for him, I would sweep you over yon garden wall
Oh, that I could cut these ties that bind me...

***

I'm the opposite of Amnesia
You're a cherry blossom-                               
                           -you're about to bloom.
You look so pretty but you're gone so soon.

***

I cast the line
I couldn't wait
to bait
too late.
Too bad, it's fate.

It's fate.
Your face.

***

Sometimes my words are better expressed in words that are not my words.
Sometimes karma works for us in the eyes of those who's journey we have not yet seen.
Sometimes I put cookies into a glass of milk and eat them with a spoon.
This morning I put Reeses in my smoothie.
Does it still count as a smoothie if it's got Reeses in it?


***

The thing is, I'm still figuring things out.
I'm a mess. But who isn't?
Maybe my mess matches yours. 

Do not cry, my 
dearest. It was not 
meant to be. I had no 
right to win your heart. 
I had no chance to 
win your love. So 
now, I'm afraid I must 
say farewell.


**
I just cannot
I cannot do it.
The universe will bring me what I need.
Do I believe that?
Even when I'm not getting it at the moment?
Do I take my own advice, about feeling okay with the lack of instant gratification and knowing that I am okay in the moment
In this hectic, psychotic, sociopathic, Facebook-stalking, wishful thinking, lucid dreaming moment?
Yeah. I have to. I have no other choice.
If I can't do it, I can't believe it.
I know I'm okay.
No matter what you sons of bitches do to me 
or take from me
or give to me
or copy of me
or deny me. 
I'm golden.
I'mgoldenI'mgoldenI'mgolden.

Easily distracted
I'll fabricate for you
                Tired of small talk
Tired of small ties

She should have just said "yes."
But I missed my chance
But the line is cast - can't take it back.

no, it's really deleted.
I didn't know how you felt.
So be it.
That's okay.
I didn't need you anyway.
I didn't need you anyway.
I don't need you anyway.

Moon anyway (any - way.)

losers.







s   i   l    e    n     c      e 


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