Sticks and stones, motherfucker
Such bullshit
You loaded that gun and aimed it at the core of me.
What you don't seem to understand
is that I'm well aware of how different I am
but the changes you see are being viewed through a veil of "I wish she was"
I'm not yours to wish
And I'm happy with myself. I'm happy with the way I am, and I love myself.
I love my ability to crank out pieces, designs, finished products. I love my word play, my purple hair, the chip in my tooth from chewing on my lip stud too much.
I am not motivated by money and I am disgusted by greed, but I sure as hell know I will be successful one day. I will provide for myself, for my family. I will do it because I know I can, because I want to. Because I know my dreams are big and only keep growing
but so does the sky
so does the universe
and the Universe has my back. I'm magic, dude.
Your words come from a place of insecurity. Of hurt, of anger, of disappointment, of lack of confidence.
Those things are not caused by me.
Those things are inside all of us.
Those things are inside me.
I am learning every day to deal and control and cope and overcome. The more I learn, the more experienced I get at doing these things. That doesn't mean it gets any easier. But it gets easier to pick up and keep going.
What I want to say is
Don't take your issues out on me
Because I made changes you wish you could have made
You flaunt your plans like peacock feathers
Thinking your eyes will turn me green
Why would they?
They're your plans. Not my plans.
Jealousy is a wasted emotion. You can't be jealous and creative.
I'm not here to hurt you. Collectively, humans aren't here to damage each other's souls.
But sometimes we do anyway.
At the least, we should try and only do it in misunderstanding, and not with intent. There's no reason for that.
You are growing desperate. Desperate for
me to have an epiphany, so to speak, that will solve everything in
your world. I can't even begin to tell you how backwards and pointless that is.
I am going where I am going and I don't see your personal direction on my GPS. You are going to have to accept that. Whether we remain friends or not is beside the point. To get on with your life, you are going to have to accept that the certain parts you are hung up on are done. Now it's this time, and it's never any time to be hung up on the past.
I fail to realize which parts of myself you think my previous self would have loathed so entirely. The part that drives me to work so much? My work is my creation, the promotion of my creation.
I love my work. The part that still goes running and cares about how much food I eat?
I definitely love and value my health. The part that does substances?
Versus what, the time when I couldn't afford them? That hasn't changed! This is the self I always strived for. This is the self I wanted. I am proud of the position I have gotten myself to. I still struggle with ego daily, although now it's keeping it in check whereas before I was so self deprecating it was shriveled up and neglected. As long as I remember that it's about the impact we make on other people that matters most, I think I will be okay.
I guess this post could have been summed up.
TL;DR: Haters gonna hate. A house doesn't make you a man. Nor does that job, or that car. Don't project your problems and lack of belief in yourself onto my life. Not everyone can hang. You won't be the first or the last to tap out and fall away. I thought we were real friends though. That makes it different. Save yo drama for yo mama.
BYE FELICIA.
I am chasing down my wildest dreams every day. What are you doing?
Also, Kid Cudi is tonight.
Kid Cudi is tonight.
I'm little but I'm comin for ya
I'm little but I'm comin for the crown
And those who were seen dancing were thought insane
by those who could not hear the music.
MOON.
